A couple of points. I myself don't like Unity either, I have tried
10.10, 11.04, 11.10 and kinda waiting for 12.04 but don't expect
to be using it either. I was on 10.04 and I think one of the updates
made my audio quit working.
I am now on Mint 11 and may go up to Mint 12.
Now about Unity that Mike was talking about.
Can't help on number 1.
But on number 2, if you can put the panel back on the top
won't you have the clock/calendar back. Speaking of the desktop
isn't there a setup to allow you to move the launcher around, and
put the panel back.
On number 5 I think you can move the three from the left side to
the right side of the page, like it has always been. I found out
out by doing a Google search on moving the
from left to right. I is some kinda of gnome editor, maybe called
gconfig-editor, the web site has instructions on how to move it.

Just a few ideas to maybe help you get to use Unity. If you
can't find the web page send me an email and I will look in some
notes I have upstairs.